Letter To My Next


Dear Next,

I don’t want you. Present is doing a darn good job. But, peradventure the tidings of fate bid me differently, this is my note to you.

I hope you persist in your hunt for me, and when you have me, show me that my ideals of what love and dating is fVcked out. That you show me that mainstream ideas of what constitutes dating and being in love is nothing more than a facade to the authenticity of what love should be.

Teach me to be comfortable in this love that we have, and not to fret when the honeymoon phase is over and I realize we might be more different than I thought we were. Because love is not a feeling, it is a choice. It is a choice to exist in the differences that we have, because though familiarity is very endearing in love, it is wrong to imagine that being different and in love are mutually exclusive.

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Call me at 2AM because you went to pee and thought to tell me how much I mean to you. I want sweet nothings; endless sweet nothings. Don’t save “I love you”s for special occasions because they sound like music to my ears every single time. Show me that I can let go of the walls I have built around my heart to save it from heartbreak by leading the way. Tell me your deepest, darkest secrets so that I can find solace to my very fvcked up life within the fore-walls of our love.

Reassure me that you’re here to stay every time my insecurity seeps in because of the love-gone-awry stories that are prevalent in the world today.

That love might have failed me once, but it won’t fail me again.

That regardless of what the world might portray, I deserve love, and you’ve been sent to show me just how deserving of love I am.

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Show that even beyond this love, you are a good person. You treat other people with compassion, empathy, and kindness Because then I  have no doubt that in the very lows in our relationship, you will at least remain good to me, and I need that security to persist on this journey that we are taking.

I want to look forward to so many adventures to take on with you, because you have defied the odds of my very short attention span. You still manage to give me butterflies even when we’ve sailed the ships of the beginning stages of relationships where everything is usually smooth and lovey dovey. Teach me that the length of time is not a determinant of love, because what matters is that love exists.

Tell me to run into your arms when the weight of the world weighs me down, That even when the world deserts me, you’ll be there to save me, because being with you has shown me how much I need your companionship. It stretches out its hand to sooth the unevenness that is my heart, to caress the fine lines of my skin and embalm the hurt in my heart.

I hope you can give me all these and all, dear next.


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