VIBE GIST: Let’s Talk Nigerian Parents and Weddings

Seriously, there is something deeply problematic about the way Nigerians and Nigerian parents look at weddings. They’re loud, overcrowded, and way over the top. Everyone is always trying to outdo the other by having bizarre pop ups at their weddings.

But this is not even my issue. My issue is why do people look at me like they’ve just seen a ghost when I tell them you want a small wedding? I’m not against you inviting the whole world to your wedding, but I will definitely hold it against you for you to think I don’t have a right to having a small wedding.

They say “your parents will never allow you” or “your wedding day is for your parents”, but I say what are the ages of people getting married? Are they children? Don’t they have a right to have a stance on how they want their wedding to hold?

Some Nigerian parents have this questionable sense of entitlement that they should be in charge of running the whole thing. You can’t have a say or anything! It’s utterly ridiculous. Some of them use emotional blackmail and cry about how much they spent on you to get an education.

Left to me, I’ll walk up to the registry and sign those dotted lines. But I know my parents will be totally crushed. So I say, “you know what? I’ll have a wedding, but a small one.” They say no. I say “okay, since we want different things, how about you invite the whole world to the traditional wedding while the white wedding is small and intimate?” They scream no! They want to be in charge of everything and I don’t have a right to say I want a small wedding at all, which I think it’s a tad inconsiderate.

I went for a wedding sometime last year at the Landmark Event Center. It took the couple a while to come into the reception, and I asked my friend who is a cousin to the bride and was a bridesmaid at the wedding what delayed them. She said the bride had a nervous breakdown and had a crying fit because of how big and loud and rowdy the wedding was, and it truly was. I couldn’t even find anywhere to sit for a while. That is how I would totally feel in a big wedding and I do not intend to put myself in that situation. And it’s not even like I’m getting married tomorrow or next year oh. If you don’t marry, wahala. When you finally want to settle down, wahala again.

Hmmm! Being the child of a Nigerian parent is not for the fainthearted.

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