How To Survive The Third Mainland Bridge Closure

third mainland bridge
third mainland bridge

It is the 23rd of August soon and we all know the third mainland bridge will be closed for a few days from Thursday midnight, leaving just the option of a few not so smooth alternative routes, since the government refused to construct the fourth mainland bridge they talked about years ago.

So I think it’s only fair to talk about how we can make our travels from the mainland to the island less stressful during this period of inconvenience.
PS, this post comes with a Lil bit of humour… #wink
third mainland bridge
third mainland bridge
1. Do not. I repeat,  do not go to work.
Don’t kill me yet, give me a chance to explain my point.
So, most of us living on the mainland wake up by 4, leave our homes by 5 or 6 just to get to work early even with the 3rd mainland bridge being open {on some days, we still get to work really late}. Sometimes we even work late just to wait out traffic because the rush automatically shuts the bridge down. So tell me, if humans can shut the bridge down making movement difficult, why bother going to work when the bridge is closed. You might literally not get to work because you’ll spend the day on the road, seeing that the alternative routes also have loads of people trying to struggle through. Or you might want to move into your workplace.  And that brings us to my next point.
2. Move into your office. Like, pack your things and live there.
So this is an idea a friend of mine thought of but I’m going to claim it as mine. #wink. Yes,  I am petty like that.
Instead of risking the health and wellness of staffs and productivity, everyone could just move into the office. It can be called “OCCUPY”.

Sleepover at your jobs till the weekend then you can struggle your way home. Don’t worry though employers are free to kick anyone with bad hygiene or body odour out. We can’t risk the office smelling like an abattoir.

Don’t forget. My Idea!!!
third mainland bridge
third mainland bridge
3. Small girls,  it’s time to please the big god
If you do not know where you can find a big god, we have an article on our blog for that. If you do have one, this is the time you might want to please him, you just might need it to get a very comfortable place to stay or get lodged in an expensive hotel. So, you might want to consider doing those things he wants to be done. The small boys are not left out though, I’m pretty sure they are big gods out there for you too. Just saying, you never know what you find.
Joking apart though, the next few days will be a struggle for Lagosians, movements will be restricted, productivity will be affected and a lot more. My advice, look for a way to make it easier on yourself. The traffic will not be funny.

See Also…

3RD MAINLAND BRIDGE TO BE CLOSED FROM AUGUST 23RD – 26TH

DUNCAN MIGHTY: WHAT SINGER MUST DO TO TURN DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SCANDAL AROUND FOR GOOD

EID-EL-KABIR: 13 RIDDLES ONLY REAL MUSLIMS CAN ANSWER

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