In every relationship, there’s a stage where both partners feel like they’ve lost the spark or fallen out of love. They tend to look for comfort or companionship outside to fill that space they’re feeling at that point in time. One or both parties are either bored in the relationship and would want to try new things to spice things up or have fun with other people, so they can feel alive or single again.
Most relationships tend to be restricting and boring to the point where the partner feels suffocated or drained from the things he or she use to do.
Now the real question is What kills that spark and results in a failed relationship?
Here are some reasons;
Partners tend to get too comfortable around themselves to the point they no longer put in efforts to impress each other either physically or emotionally. They feel at that point, once they have you that’s it, they don’t have to dress or look good to impress you. Some would start talking in disrespecting tones, lose regard for the partner, maybe take things without permission etc. The Nigerian man would say ‘see finish’ cause that’s what happens. So yeah, over-familiarity can be a reason for the spark dying in the relationship.
2. Been Too Available
When I say “availability kills the spark in a relationship” don’t get me wrong, partners should always be available or be there, but when you are ‘too available’ it becomes a problem. It starts to seem as though you’re jobless or don’t have plans or dreams asides from being with your partner.
Space in a relationship is needed sometimes, not like you don’t talk over the phone or anything but let your partner miss you a little. Don’t choke your partner with too much attention, give them space to breathe a little.
3. A Boring Sex Life
Yes, your sex life is really important in a relationship. If you’re the type to set timetables to have sex with your partner, then you’re laying a bad foundation for your relationship. Maybe during the first stages of your relationship, nobody’s complaining or saying anything because of the excitement of being in love, but after a while, it’s better to talk more about your sexual fantasies or things that can make your sex life more interesting and work on them, so no one gets too bored and looks outside for the sexual satisfaction they’re not getting from you.
4. Lack of Communication
Always keep in touch with your partner. A day or two without talking to someone you claim to love or in a relationship with kills it unknowingly. A day can seem like a year apart, so always call to check up, tell each other how your day went and share jokes, make gest or whatever. Just don’t ever give room for too much space because the human mind is programmed in a way that once you give it room for other people or things to occupy, you get divided attention.
5. If there was never Love
Some people don’t get into relationships because they’re in love, they get into it thinking they’ll grow to love, like and understand their partner. But at the end of the day, it doesn’t work out and BOOM it results in a failed relationship.
6. Loss of physical attraction
A lot of people try their best to be in shape so their partners won’t lose the attraction. While some become too comfortable and fall out of shape and that makes the partner lose the attraction they had for them. They start looking outside for what they saw in you before you went out of shape. It can even be a change in how you dress, so everyone should try their best to look attractive for your partners because once there’s no longer an attraction, their eyes would be out there and the relationship will start crumbling before your very own eyes.
7. Lack of Ambition
Both parties in a relationship should have a plan for the future, know what they want and how to work towards it. If your partner is a ‘Joseph the Dreamer’, without any plan of working, then he/she lacks the ambition to be successful and such people can’t settle down and take care of their families (that is if you’re planning to settle down together).
That is a deal breaker for some people because nobody wants to settle with a loser or a lazy person. Don’t just have dreams, work on them.